haha i found out smthing new.
something mr bio never mentioned in his lessons. lol.
but it's really not that impt. HAHA.

fact: if there's insufficient fat in girls... estrogen level goes down and testosterone level rises. LOL! which just equals to EEW.
i wonder if it's just the opposite way around for guys, too much fat..causes rise in estrogen levels....hmm...whahah..that just sounds so wrong and funny.. oh man.. HAH.

thanks ann for the info! (if u know what i mean) (: LOL

YIXIN is soo super cute! just went to visit her ytd..but she was sleeping...with all the noise.
good training though... (: i think we woke her up...):
her milk bottle is like bigger than her face and the nozzle tip thing is way too big for her mouth. i seriously wonder how babies drink out of such a ginormous bottle...
oh and i found out another interesting fact : your eyeballs have always been the same size since you were born. how cool/scary is that. that explains why kids have such gorgeous eyes.

went to sch in slippers today. felt so weird. ppl were like " eh ur foot looks fine wad, why u wear slippers?" having to keep explaining that my toe's swollen can get rather tiring after awhile.

sometimes i'm glad that no one ever tells me gossip stuff. it just totally changes ur impression of them and it spoils everything. it's like how i used to be okay-terms with A....how i never knew what kind of __ lifestyle she had... i heard it all today( the true stuff not rumors) and i was like "WAD!" so sad la. still rmb the time i used to 'take care' of her like many years ago...lol. at least now she's not in the same sch as me..so i won't unintentionally be cold towards her if i were to see her....
there's lots more 'new' stuff i've found out about ex-schmates today..
and now i can see they said i was THE innocent one. i had always interpreted it differently...hmm..haha.
so looks like being 'deaf' to these things is good.
anyway i'm really not someone who will take entirely whatever one says. there's always a portion to ask urself about..whether it's truth,rumor,comment,critique, or just trashy rubbish spewing out cos they've run out of stuff to talk about.
i definitely dont want to go around thinking negatively of someone just becos i heard smthing bout them. unless i have seen the person exhibit that character or something..then perhaps i'll believe to a certain extent. lol.
i'll just go " huh...why liddat wan"
LOL.
but......there are others who appear to be all bad and fierce and infamous...but in reality..they're really really pleasant and well..not bad. they have their reasons for acting all whatever-ishly..and well..befriend their nicer side i guess...(shrugs)
(:

yesterday was some weird day for me - injury day! ):
jumped out of bed when i realised i overslept 15 mins.
then ran over to wake my sis..and i hit my leg on the air circulator fan thing..one big scratch.
ok so i got a blister from wearing my leather sneakers to cell on sat, and decided it would be better to wear slippers ytd.
and so i did. but then..while walking back from brunch i kind of slammed my last toe on some rock platform thing..it hurt for like 2 secs then i though it was alright. until like 5 mins later i saw the silly toe swell...man it hurt. it was the exact same thing that happened at saturate camp.. and now again. hais.
moreover the slipper i was wearing, the front strap was adding pressure to the swell so the pain was like...AH!
i walked around barefoot for practically the whole service to sort of relieve my foot from pain temporarily.. but yah it still hurt.
right after sermon ended while ann was keeping her pencil and book...the pencil like slashed my forearm. so like now there's one big bloody red line.. with all the blood clotted..so it looks gross. lol.
so with me barely limping i was sure i couldn't board buses and go for violin lesson for the least. first i went to get a new pair of flip-flops so it won't hurt so much when i walked.. then i called mr lee...and he was like '' next week exam and u cannot come!!?? ur foot pain..still can play violin anot? nvm take cab i pay for you." i was like woah. super ex eh.
he's so super nice. but of course i told him nvm no need to pay but he still did ..haha..he was just so glad i went for lesson.. lol
so anyways. since this is like the second time...quite scary. better to have it checked.. instead of it getting worse in future. i just hope there's no fracture or anything. craps.
so together with that..gta go check on my foot alignment problem thing..cos the way i walk causes my feet to deflect on one side..and it kind of spoils dunno what thing..so need to get referral to cgh for some foot doctor?? i dunno haha.
wells anyways.
been seeing this word EVERYWHERE ytd – insecurity.
how saul had it and it ruined everything..
and how we should place our security in the things of God. in His love, wisdom..etc..
it’s amazing how you get the ans to the qns that pop in your head in the week..only on Sunday!
haha. it’s been happening every week since this year started. and I’m still baffled. Lol.
but yah..like how i dunno how this foot thing's gna work out..but just gna trust God that everything will be alright. (: cos i mean hey, He's healed me like soo many times...like of my asthma(when i was really young), lactose-intolerance and stuff...
and like God has answered my prayers, questions, multiple requsts for confirmations etc..way too many times. and of course i definitely trust. (:
i've already got answers to certain things in life..i'm just wating for His timing that i can see those things come to pass....hopefully soon..cos i've been waiting for like forever now...haha..
sad. i'm missing sch again. just hope they don't think i'm skipping sch again. haha.
another 5 days left in SR. till posting comes out next tues. mon there's violin exam..................rahs. lol.
Trust that God will bring us all thru this week in victory. yea!

i'm amazed at how fast time flies.
and i dun think the phrase ' time passes fast when u're having fun' fits now...cos well...not very fun eh now..lol
i have come to realise today that my vocab is super limited.
had another! gp test today. some graphic stuff then ask u identify issue..tt was alright. but the second part was like...gosh i have like never seen such words before! siao wan la. and like the rest of the class...i just tikum-ed. so bad.
argh i dun like chacko. keep suan-ing the whole class la.. every lesson got diff target wan...so yer!.. he thinks he's sooooo darn funny lar. raahs.
haha i passed my econs test!! yes!
haha.
yay!! liuyan finally has given birth!! can't wait to see Joy-anna Chia Yixin! ahs...all the cute babies...whhaha.. !!! ((:
but hmm....amidst all the fun and stuff that goes on in life...even when things seems fine so far... i do feel afraid. like what if......... just if............. it's not that there's no faith or no trust...it's just the weirdest feeling...i mean it's so scary. Even though i know God's with me and all...funny how i do feel insecure sometimes....
but as the song does go...be still and know He is God.. (:
it's nice to know and experience that despite where u are..even in the most unlikely situations..u can't help but feel God's presence..and that's just enough.. haha
okays this is so random. but yah..
yays gg chi new yr 'visiting' tmr...only at su's and gerry's house..LOL
good enough la huh...get to eat wonderful stuff..!! (; yumms!

it's one of those days where everything seems so meloncholic...and u are so stoned...and everyone including urself wonders why.
so now i ask.why?
but then. i have no idea!
lol.
yah.
totally stoned the whole of first 2 periods. and mark tan was all.....why does everyone look so zombified??
lol.
we played taboo....haha so fun..
then had stupid gp...get back test. stupid lar. i've failed every single gp test ever since i stepped into sr. raaahs.
it's called. lack of guidance = failure.
i have no idea what the heck they're asking for la.
just give us a silly essay to write la instead of individual assignments like finding out issues and other lame-o stuff...
i feel so dreadful. cedar come sr already no face. then cedar come sr and fail all the gp tests. even worse la!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
okays. i guess it's a pride thing. ):
hais.
and i think i haven't gotten used to this bunch of ppl i'm stuck wif as classmates.
i can't do what i normally do without giving them the wrong impression.
like today..kenna arrowed to partner jesse. of ALL ppl. him. argh. nvm. i din mind. but i gave the oh alrights not like i have a choice kind of face. and after class my friends were like 'u were super pissed rite?' and i was like NO wad. i wasn't.. hais....
and i was so happy to have ponned sch on thurs such that i missed geog test.
and crap today she say need to make-up. like WAD!!!??
violin exam on 5 march!
2 weeks away!
my scales are still dead!
argh. HELP!
lol.
i'm beginnning to think lit tuts are making me dramatic. now is that good or bad??
SR is SOOOOOOOOOO slack la.
cannot tahan.
too slack.
too slack.
maybe it's good that i'm headed towards a mugger sch. hmm....
see a new me in 3 weeks..... mugger sherni! LOL. tt doesn't seem to fit. hah.
now to start. mug for tmr's geog test. yay me. x[

bwaha.
service started at 8..even though it's like just half hour diff than before...it's so early la!!
wake up like before 7 eh!! raahs. but ok nvm. shan't be whiny..
totally the wrong day to wear long-sleeves...WRONG DAY!!! wah man. so HOT la today...sweat like some pig la. eew.
whaha. but ok la. service was good. though it was SO short. ): i still dun get why changes have to be made just cos of chi new yr. no 3rd service...short 1st and 2nd...felt weird. lol.
wake up call...DUN BE LUKEWARM!
heh. i admit sometimes it gets comfy and like just want to stay at that level of satisfaction. but yepp..there's so much more at a higher level..so must WAKE UP and climb the stairs to the next level. ok lame analogy thingy..but raahs i dun care. i feel so lame after today's brunch-time. laugh like siao la. i bet the ppl at macs thought we were mad. blame it all on princess. haha. really wad...nothing to laugh at also laugh like siao..hais.. i should seriously carry a paperbag whenever i go out wif them.. LOL. ok joking. bad joke. bah. -.-''
my neighbour so nice ah...gave us one big bag of bee cheng hiang bakwa?? how to spell?? lol. but yah. super nice la!!!! now there's like so many oranges and bottles of pineapple tarts and bbq pork..and wah...gna get fat. oh no!!!!!!! exercise!!! lol.no time. no one to go run wif me. ): run wif my dad sure die wan. run so fast. hmph.forever pangseh me wan.can't cycle cos the bike is my sister's. sit ups and push ups aren't much of a help. bah.... how??
wah. this week got so many questions in my head la. how this..how that.. lol. so annoying. and the worst part is i've got no answers to them. raahs.
ah. mr lee is like soo super nice. ah ha. finally he said i played well!!! and gave me two thumbs up!! haha. waited like how many years for him to do that. so hard to get him to say good la. lol. just need to make sure i play like that during the exam if not die(cos he said he'll kill me with the stupid knife he smuggled in from china.) dun wan to fail again!!!!!
i think i can't sing for nuts la. my aural is like so totally bad. saded. this stinks.
so now i'm on cny break. so darn bored. so darn bored. no hw to keep me irritated and occupied. hardly anyone to talk to since all my friends busy visiting. so stuck at home. to rot. and rot. and be bored. yay me.

bah...mummy said i can't (verb) (noun). cos (noun) is (adjective). hais.
wad a reason la...raahs..but ok nvm. we'll see how stuff work out..
oh man. was supposed to go to sch today. but i totally overslept. so pig la. woke up at 10.
lol. at least i'm getting some sleep nowadays.. good riddance of my black eyes. (0.0)
LOL.
nah. need to upgrade my sim. no time. still got stinking violin later at night and tmr.
i wonder if there's cell tmr...hmm..still no news yet..hais
i'm so bored.
and i think i'm getting hooked on silly korean dramas...whahas.
i never imagined myself watching them like this...haha.. [:
i must be nuts.
maybe i am.

v-day!

oh man.ytd was like so fun! lol.
best vday ever!
oh wait. it's the only vday i did something...cos i din have sch!!
lol. whaha. went out with han( she kept saying it was weird for 2 girls to go out together on vday..like wadever -.-)
cut my hair..
lunched at sakae
train-ed to orchard
walked around taka
shopped at kino( silly me i accidentally said kuni) so lame la.
walked around somemore. wanted to get a pair of shoes and bottoms to match the top i bought last week..
but in the end din buy shoes..altho they were all so nice..
bought a pair of dunno whether to call them pants or berms..cos they're like a combi of both. lol.
basically we just walked around..alot.. oh ya..
we bought takopachi and stood around to eat..haha...
then we just walked around isetan?? dunno but somewhere...see all the cute hp pouches..and all the plush and cuhions..super cute lar.
halfway my dad called ask me what's the hp model i wanted... so weird of him to do that la..but yah i told him then he said we can go get it next week.. it felt too good to be true la that he called just to tell me that...hmm..something's fishy..
after that my phone like just din stop ringing la.. mummy..amanda..then so many other ppl keep calling me la..anyway yahs..
wanted to buy nailpolish...but then later din feel like buying..
crazy hanwei just asked me to try tester..lol. she like totally splotched a blob on not only my nail but my finger also! wah man.. hais...so gross la..
haha..so yah..waited with her till her parents came to fetch her..then i cabbed home..
wah man..waited like 20+ mins for the stupid cab la..after getting into the cab got stuck in the silly pie jam for like super long..and the meter just kept jumping! stupid meter..lol. then the bill also so nice la..hmph. but the driver so funny...ask me wad day it was yesterday..say why everyone carrying flowers...lol..asked if it was a public hol! whaha.so cute la.
aha..i love my hair now...lol..but by tmr it'll be back to normal..crap..my mum saw my hair and what i bought ytd, say my decision-making skill super good!! haha.. *hees* asked me go rebond my hair...like no way!..dun wan spoil my hair..lol.. i like the way i'm uniquely made...(:
no sch today either!! haha..ponned it. i think tmr also i dun wan go eh..half day only..waste my time..i escaped geog test today!!!!!!! woohoo!! yay me!

haha reviewing the past few days:

sat-zone service
was good ah. although the attendance abit...not alot just abit..sad la.
do projection duty. wah the comp and projector and screen all siao siao wan! divided la. it's time they unified their hearts. lol.
first time see adorie type...wah man so super fast la!! pro-ness.
but despite all the tech probs... the presence of God was so tangible.so..wah! (=
lol. yah. isaiah preached a super power message..on like how we can take step towards living the BIG life..or at least smthing along that line ah.
it was the exact answer i've been asking God for the past 2 days. in a sense that.. i couldn't decide bw arts or sci. i mean arts is something i like..and i can do.but in future i won't be gg into the arts line so abit waste. but sci is wad i dun like. i really..according to me..cannot handle.sure get super stressed..but it will help me get my scholarship.. so basically was confused.
then it clicked in my head.
1. PLACE MY SECURITY IN GOD.
2.TAKE RISKS.FACE THE WAVE.
3. FOCUS ON OUR DREAMS
4. DUN GIVE UP
5. best of all..LET GOD TAKE HIS PLACE AND BRING YOU THROUGH.
that was all i needed to hear. and i made my decision.
even though i'll be hard for me. i'm gonna trust God.(hey, He gave me an A2 for bio after 3F9s and a C6! beat that.)
haha. so well yah. i couldn't argue after that. came home then went out for dinner to celebrate!!
haha.

sun
wanted to go for 1st service. but was seriously too tired. so went for lunch then 3rd. another power service. how do we feel God?~
though it has never been a question for me...cos most of the time even before i ask i alr get my answers. funny but true.
but i guess..some haven't exactly in a certain sense felt God before..so yah...
dunno but these few days like there's this greater desire/hunger to grow closer...to like just want to linger in His presense longer and like..aiya..dunno how to explain..but yah..strange feeling.but it's a good feeling. lol.
as in can really see hoe God is raising up my family as a whole. my parents under training for cell leaders...then my sis..going on mission trips..and me..well lead worship lol. yah.slowly i guess..

mon
after all that on sat and sun. i think i spoilt the atmosphere thingy. haas.
went to pan's and han's house. play mahjong and cards the whole time. LOL.
totally lost during mahjong. but whatever la..get dunno wad pair then 2 triplets..something like that la. i basically played matching game.. haha.
but fun ah. yvonne pan gail han and me..haha..ordered kfc for lunch wich arrived looking kind of pathetic. haha. but in the end we became healthy by having our forfeits as drinking water..lots of it. haha. good for those who hardly drink water..lols. oh yah. my sms was like flooding la...the past few days..raahs

today
is slack day. supposed to bake brownies! and han was supposed to come over. but then last min can't. nvm. brownies were suppposed to be for 1A05 ppl..oh yes we rock! except for some ppl. oops. ok i shan't be mean. everyone's nice in their own lil' ways la. tmr supposed to have class outing but then no one confirm anything then wah so irritating la. raahs. if they don't tell me, then i won't know how many to bake. so in the end..as in now i've decided not to bake at all.. since i think most prob we won't be gg anwhere tmr..one by one sure say cannot make it and in the end will only have a few ppl left. hais. why always liddis wan!!! ): anyways. since i'm at home. i gta do all the stinkin housework. crap gta vacuum and mop. and stuff like that.....argh.
~

yays. can't wait for tmr! going out wif hanwei! and she's finally coming to the east...away from the serangoon region..lol. haha. gna cut my hair and buy stuff!!!(with the little money i have) LOL.but what the heck. still fun la. (:

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOL. ok. madness.
haha. go take results today.
totally no feeling the whole week. today morning also no feeling. till i was on the bus to hanwei's house then i started feeling abit stressed.
then had lunch..but actually only a drink. no mood to eat.
then bused back to sch and me yvonne on the bus. talk talk smile smile. then reach sch hall then wah.. i was like OH SHOOTS!! abit late to get scared. but nvm. haha.
then saw class msg. jump from 12.6 expected to 10.4 actual. and i felt relieved. as in really relieved. then i saw pure lit msg : 3.6. dist %: 12.7! like WAD! la. so sucky. i was all SHOOTS! again. lol.
then go take result slip.
din dare see i tell u. then i slowly slip the paper one sub by one sub. happy then sad then happy and happy and sad and sad and sad and happy and no feeling. tt's cos i just saw the numerical grade. din see the sub name. then i tot the agg will be printed on the same page and i saw wadv no. that was there.and it was 8. so i tot woah! i got *! lol. then realised was the no. of subs i took. so lame la! haha.
but anw. then i slowly saw the grade and sub together and realised i did well. super proud of myself la. it could only have been God who gave me what i go la. i seriously tot i got like Cs and stuff..but yay PRAISE GOD!! if not for HIM ah i dunno where i'd go. (: 12. - 2.=10. haha . not bad la. there's cause for celebration which is why i took the liberty to go vivo wif sarah, han and joy. lol. tired. we were so mad la take pics everywhere. shop wif no purpose. then stone at starbucks. wah not good leh. go drink coffe all the time..baD.BAD!! stop drinking coffee sherni!!! aiyo. haha. well. mon tues and wed will be packed. haha yes! no sch till thurs! oh yea.... haha.

hahas! this is my 100th post! lol. ok. nvm.
man i finally caught up with my bible reading plan today. yes!
then i realised the stuff printed in the newsletter thingy is the same as the previous week's...raaah.): saded.
Psalm 19: 14 -
let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight,O Lord, my strength and my redeemer.
was something that caught me today.
well yah..i realised i should really watch what i say. it's like sometimes stuff come out..and i'm like..where'd that come from?! scary.
and sometimes u find yourself thinking negative stuff bout people...and then u slap urself and say..stop being mean..ok..maybe it's me..i dunno.but some people do get on my nerves. like those who never accept their error and try to err ur truth instead.crap these people.but God please give me patience!!
well...i almost wanted to explode at ! but i restrained myself...as a cedarian i couldn't help but react impulsively. i mean how can ! just go about insulting my sch..oh well..ex-sch at least.. i won't stand any of that kind of rubbish. here i am trying to help keep cedar's reputation by not messing up the sch u..and ! tries tearing it all down... ): ): )': T.T raaah.
well...funny thing's that mr mark tan painted his fingernails black! LOL. in rmbrance of his j2s taking common tests so that he can mourn for them. like real. and man, my acting is bad. i can't even act like a witch. lol. can't blame me la.half the time my words get eaten up cos of my bad throat. ever since youth camp's...i've gotten it twice! so pain! and irritating! ): ugh. all the more my singing has gone from bad to worse..sop 1 i think now become alto..sad case...trying my best to shut up tonight and tmr..but i think that's totally impossible.. knowing me...if i talk i'll just continue crapping. or i'll just laugh alot.which is just as bad... my teacher probably tot i was crazy or lazy or smthing when i told her i can't run but can do pe(play softball).silly. but really.run then breathe will dry the throat.so i just pitched throughout the game. yay me! haha. but quite frustrating cos her rules for softball is super diff from the way i learnt..as in rules here are so flexible..not nice play liddat la...hais...but still..better than stoning on the steps watching people play.. (: sore throat(saw throat) go away!!!!!! *shouts loudly* *coughs* bah.

today's sermon was so appropriate.just wad i was praying about this whole week.
hearing God's voice.
=) so nice to know that i'm more or less in tune..if i can safely put it that way..
and i just realised today how UN-INFORMED i am about ALOT of things that are happening around me in lives of people who i see so often. oh man. this is bad. no wonder why liuyan and lijuan say i'm innocent. like wadever. well found out some stuff bout ** and realised the underlying problem. wah man. listen and felt like crying la. i mean it's exactly wad i went thru last time. and at least i lived thru that stage of mine..enuf to tell a victorious testimony..(:
ok at least she can trust one person in the cell...
and ya. ** got bad timing again! forever la.won't change one.. and i know where the info came from. liar la! next time just tell me la. dun try beat around the bush and skip around the road can?! haiz. ppl ah....
ooh. i learnt a new chinese word. green = qing! haha. i progress. =))
oh tt day i drank macchiato. not mochachinno. lol!
FEB. that time of the year where everyone talks about flowers and chocolates and notes with sweet romantic mushy stuff scribbled all over. but i dun get why vday is always equated to extra love and gifts between couples..or couples-to-be..or smthing along that line.. why can't it also be between loved ones..like family and good friends.. why go along with the stereotypes? ok. i'm weird. i think odd. but wadever. funny how ppl go around telling guys how they should all be gentlemen and give all the girls flowers and stuff... but that's so not from the heart la. it's like just give..then orh. yah i gave. that kind of thing. so..aiya..dunno how to say..and it's really funny to hear ppl talk of their relationships..the gf goes.." wah my bf so nice! treated me like royalty *smiles*"...and the bf goes "i spent so much money on her.she better appriciate it orh. my poor money..*sobs*". somehow i seriously find it hilarious. not wanting to be mean. but i mean there's a limit to everything eh.. spending a thousand bucks in a month just buying stuff..is a bit too much rite? and expecting the other person to pay for every meal..taxi fare..and gifts..what's becoming? and the statement my friend leaves is.. be happy being unattached. if someone comes then so be it. dun go searching for someone cos it's very burdensome... lol. i still think it's really funny.
haha. i've left everything in God's hands for now. not gna be bothered bout these kind of stuff. the time will come.... a long time from now. HAHA.

there was a word stuck in my head this past week.
sensitivity.
not just physically or emotionally towards others... but towards circumstances.
like how i'm always so hard up. i mean i can't help it. sometimes for certain things i seriously feel numb about them. that's probably why i can listen to people without actually feeling affected by their problems and like sort of advise them.. but at other times it's really a hinderance.
like if i'm in a terrible situation..and have no feeling whatsoever...i would in fact..not be bothered at all. i mean i'm not the kind who who fret over something that went wrong..if it just happens then too bad la..that's probably what i'd say. unless i'm pretty sure the fault lies with the other party. that's a different story altogether.
anw..this sensitivity thing. been thinking bout it. that i should be more sensitive to wad God's trying to tell me.. either directly..from people..or to people. that i won't see things as they are..on the surface..but deeper.
if i do ask anyone...i'd be sure they won't say i'm a sensitive person. but there's the weird part. i'm not like that on the inside. but on the outside... lol. it's really funny. i get bruised super easily.and it gets irritating. if a speck of dust lands on my skin i can feel it.i dunno how. and the list carries on. so i guess like how i'm like that outside.. i better change my heart..or at least ask Daddy to change me. (:
~
the weirdest things happen in sch. and i dun think people would believe it's me..if they saw me in sch. LOL. even i think i'm different. maybe cos it's a small class. i dunno. but yah. i mean..it's good that i'm not like old times. it's more fun now.
and man...lit skit texts are messed up.sick la.felt so weird. and of all ppl mark tan had to choose anthony... drunkard vs captain = cannot make it!! haha. tt's about how lit went.
and econs mr ang i think only can remember my name and joel's.keep calling me lar...and always ans wrong. my econs needs help. ):
yays! sat tmr. then sun! then anytime next week get results!so fun. but so scary. but no. i did my best. can't be that bad wad. rite? i hope.(: haha
and oh! gp test. so hard la. then today give back..chacko was flashing the closest to A grade kind...and then say want to show us the D grade one as well.and i saw him pick out the script that looked like mine. i was like oh shoots. die la. 1st test then so bad! then he flashed it. and said i had good literary skills. meaning my handwriting super nice! haha!! i was like wah! cool. so i tot he was gna say i got D. then rmb he took the wrong script. so in e end wasn't mine! yays! (: lame la. but u know...